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It’s your fortune, cookie.

November 9, 2009

Don’t you hate it when fortune cookies have a deep, hidden, annoying meaning? I mean, right at the end of a nice meal you want to hear something like “A closed mouth gathers no feet,” or “He who throws dirt is losing ground.”

But noooo… Here’s the one I got on Friday: “You will be made stronger by adversity.” Ha! Just what I need. Why can’t I just have no adversity and continue to be a wimp? Is that too much to ask?

Hank’s fortune made up for it. His was, “You will exceed your expectations.” His remark: “Well, that shouldn’t be too hard.”

At which point I snorted tea up my nose laughing.

Other than that, I have nothing to say.

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11 Comments leave one →
  1. mom permalink
    November 9, 2009 8:16 pm

    Did the tea cure your cold?

    Mom

    • Jill permalink
      November 9, 2009 8:20 pm

      Hehehehe! No. But a tea nasal rinse is probably a not a bad idea.

  2. mom permalink
    November 9, 2009 8:21 pm

    How about comments heard during colonoscopy exams:

    “You know in Arkansas we are now legally married.”

    “Hey, Now I know how a muppet feels!”

    “If your hand doesn’t fit, you must quit.”

    “Hey doc, let me know if you find my dignity”

    Pretty bad, huh?

    • Jill permalink
      November 9, 2009 8:24 pm

      Love ’em. You’re on a roll tonight…..

  3. mom permalink
    November 9, 2009 8:29 pm

    Thanks. Had one earlier by Voltaire that said:

    If it is to stupid to say it is sung. Tea Bag tag by the Good Earth people.

    What do you think?

    • Jill permalink
      November 9, 2009 8:38 pm

      I agree. If you print out song lyrics they’re usually stupid and boring.

  4. November 10, 2009 2:34 pm

    Those fortunes are amazing! I’d have snorted my drink in laughter, too!

    Here are some funny/sarcastic ones for you:

    Please don’t eat me. I love you.
    I cannot help you, for I am just a cookie.
    Only a fool would look to a cookie for words of wisdom.
    Help! I’m being held prisoner inside a Chinese bakery.
    Appearances can be deceiving, but you’re not fooling anyone.
    Stupidity will be your downfall.
    All of your hard work will never pay off.
    You may yearn for perfection, but mediocrity is your fate.
    Happiness and success rightly elude you.

  5. Lisa permalink
    November 10, 2009 7:08 pm

    Oh my, had the fortune cookie moment before when all I wanted was comfort food, ie Chinese. 😉 I have found them to be more accurate then astrology, although I’d take prayer any day.

    Sorry to hear you still have a cold!!!

    Healing thoughts and prayers headed your way as they are everyday!

  6. mom permalink
    November 11, 2009 12:52 pm

    Here is a blog response to “Dr. Val and the voice of reason” written as a Haiku in Psychiatry .

    All patients escape
    Their restraining devices
    If you look away.

    Amen, Mom

  7. November 16, 2009 4:30 pm

    I dunno. I kinda like some of the ones I got. At our wedding rehearsal dinner at a local Chinese restaurant, my fortune cookie read “You will always be surrounded by friends.”

    I still have it.
    And you know what? It came true!

    • Jill permalink
      November 17, 2009 4:25 pm

      I hope you have that framed!

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